Crossfit and Dating: Can the two co-exist?

by ~jenniferlynn on May 3, 2013

in CrossFit, Me

“How many of the speed dating guys emailed you so far?” my mother asked me last weekend. If you remember I briefly mentioned on the blog that I went speed dating a couple of weeks ago. Half of the time I was there, I was bummed about missing out on Deadlift Day, and as much as I tried not to bring up Crossfit in the six-minute time limit I had with each guy, it subconsciously came spewing out of my mouth just about every time; I silently scoffed at the majority that never heard of Crossfit, and wrinkled my nose at the ones that heard of it but had no desire to do it. Mixing Crossfit and dating? I may have set myself up for failure.

Out of the group of 12 diverse single men, I was mutually matched up with two (they picked me and I picked them), and six other men who I did not choose provided their emails to me in case I changed my mind and decided to contact them first.

“None, Mom.”

She replied, “They must have gone home and Googled “Crossfit” and decided you were too intimidating for them.”

i'm sorry i am more interested in crossfit than i am in dating you crossfit dating

Let me preface the rest of this by saying I am completely comfortable being single. In fact, becoming single was the best things that could have happened when it comes to my dedication to Crossfit. I no longer had to schedule my workouts around someone’s else’s schedule, and if I wanted to hang around the gym longer, no one is waiting for me at home making me feel bad about doing so. I can meal prep and plan for one and leftovers last for days. I have no children and my only obligation is to my puppy dog, so this is prime time to focus 100% on ME.

single girl barbell

At 30 years old, I am feeling the most independent, strong, and confident than I ever have, EVER. I credit most of it to Crossfit. I look better, feel better, AM better.

everyone is getting engaged and married and i am here like I just bet my PR for deadlift"

But then it got me to thinking: is this a bad thing? That I am dedicated, passionate, borderline-obsessed with Crossfit? Could an average man understand that, and accept that this is what I choose to do with my time? That I love having callouses and love being able to see definition in my muscles, and that I will squeal with excitement at every PR? That my “life goals” include deadlifting 2x my bodyweight and performing 10 strict pullups? That I prefer eating at home instead of going out to dinner because I am in control of what I am eating? That I easily eat 2000+ calories a day and have zero fear of getting “bulky”? That I will never be able to go to a “globo” gym without judging everyone? Is it strange if you ask what I do for fun, and I say, “I lift heavy”?

Crossfit and dating: Can the two coexist? Can you balance being fully invested in a fitness lifestyle but also have a healthy dating life or relationship? Check out the thoughts from @winetoweights on how her training has trumped finding an ideal mate.

Crossfit men get it.

I tried to solicit some input from both Crossfitting and non-Crossfitting men, and of the ones that were kind enough to reply, the consensus is pretty much: “Crossfit chicks are awesome,” as quoted by one of the eligible bachelors at my box.

Another of our six-packed single men couldn’t have said it better:

They show up day in and day out and tackle all of the emotional, mental and physical challenges the sport regularly presents.  This dedication HAS to bleed over into other aspects of her life. And that drive to be better every day is def. part of what makes our women so attractive.

And another un-affiliated single guy also sees no intimidation, but is “more motivated (to go faster/do more) by the women next to me rather than the other guy.”

That being said, I clearly have the support from the males of the Crossfit community and know if I ended up with a man who does Crossfit, there would be complete and mutual respect, support, and accountability. The foundation that the relationship would be built on is already a solid one, with an immense common bond that those outside the “cult” just may not understand!

I just want someone to cuddle and drink protein shakes with

Darn spelling errors!!

With that in mind, I tried to encourage some responses from men who do not do Crossfit and their thoughts on women who Crossfit, and received minimal replies.. My only conclusion is they must have been too intimidated.. 😉

While I will admit that I am somewhat bummed that neither of the guys I connected with emailed me, it does allow me to keep my focus on my time at the box and improving on my personal goals.. and doesn’t hurt that I can guiltlessly ogle at the men at the gym..

What do you think?

Must Crossfitters date other Crossfitters?
Is my mom right that guys are intimidated by my new-found awesomeness?
Does your obsession with your sport make it difficult to partner with someone who doesn’t do it?

All images were found via Pinterest; no clue who to credit for their origin.

NJ Paleo May 3, 2013 at 4:11 pm

I don’t know, my opinion is that if a guy isn’t man enough to appreciate your Crossfitting awesomeness, he isn’t the man for you! My poor husband got dragged into all my crazy fitness stuff AFTER we were together awhile, and while he doesn’t totally “get” it, he appreciates a lot of benefits from it!
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:50 am

That’s great to have someone so supportive of you, especially since I’d consider you to be on the more extreme side of active! 🙂

Nj Paleo May 10, 2013 at 7:48 am

That’s true, I am on the more extreme side of active! But while my husband gets annoyed occasionally, most of the time he thinks I’m hot (ha ha) and enjoys bragging to his friends about the weight I can lift. Fortunately, he loves me as I am…or as I have become.
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Joanna Broadbent May 3, 2013 at 4:12 pm

I think a lot off men are intimidated by women who lift in general. There are still a lot of fellas who want a disciplined lady who is confident and sure of herself! I love that you are independent, strong, and happy! Mr Perfect is out there and he will find you xoxo
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:51 am

I think you’ve been fortunate to have such a fit family 😉 That is awesome that your hubby is right there lifting with you, even though I am sure you like your alone time as well! I’m in no rush; focus on all on the weights for now 🙂

Lisa
Twitter: fantabulouslisa
May 3, 2013 at 4:15 pm

I think it’s definitely a plus!!! There are several couples at my box who seem like crossfit is their bonding time. Check out this video from Valentine’s Day:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OCSIcaKw7Uc&feature=youtu.be

It’s kindof silly, but I really think that couples who sweat together stay together. I know I’m a hypocrite because I’m newly single again. But I definitely felt like that is a bond that I want to have in all of my relationships from now on.

~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:52 am

Since most of my free time is pretty much spent at the box or with people from my box, I feel I just wouldn’t be able to give him as much attention unless he was right there with me, right?
Plus there a lot of things I think only Crossfit men would understand about Crossfit girls.. lol

Matthew May 3, 2013 at 4:20 pm

I feel the same way about my exercise. I’d rather spend $80 on a new kettlebell than a date, any day of the week. Most people I’ve dated recently don’t even exercise, which….I don’t even know what to say….really? Plus, the endorphin bump you get from exercise beats just about any ‘high’ you get dating.

~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:54 am

I agree with that for sure. And since “traditional” dating is like go out for dinner, or coffee, or whatever.. I’d rather say skip it and let’s just cook dinner together. lol
Though I don’t know how well that would fly as far as comfort level of inviting a stranger into my home or the inverse..

Matthew May 9, 2013 at 11:08 am

See, that is ideal to me. I think I even wrote I would rather stay home and cook together on a date, than go out. I was a chef for years and never have a chance to cook, so that’s a great idea, to me!

babs May 3, 2013 at 4:29 pm

If I was single, CF wouldn’t be a must, but being healthy is. We have had a lot of relationships start in our gym…and end well. 🙂

I agree with the idea of couples who sweat together stay together. I mean, you are there during some really rough days and some awesome days.

Keep focusing on you. The rest will fall into place.
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:56 am

Absolutely keeping the focus on me for now; but just wouldn’t mind a nice buff man by my side sometimes.. 😉

It just seems so much stronger if the man can just “get” what you are going through; you seem to have such a supportive one by your side!

babs May 9, 2013 at 9:11 am

Stephen is a great support. He definitely is a huge encouragement to me, daily.

The buff man will come. 🙂
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Jacki
Twitter: JackiRHayes
May 3, 2013 at 4:33 pm

I’m with a non-Crossfitter, and it hasn’t been an issue. But he is incredibly supportive of just about anything I do. He is just not a person who would enjoy those workouts, but has some serious respect for those that do (he was amazed and shocked when I got him to watch the Opens). That doesn’t mean that there isn’t a little bit of feeling left out, or me trying to find other things to talk about. Of course, I only hit the Box once a week right now…
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 8:58 am

You juggle so much, Jacki, it’s good to know that you found someone that can be so supportive with your habits even when you’re always on the go!

Cindy May 3, 2013 at 4:37 pm

I just wish I could afford Crossfit LOL! (Being a heavily indebted, dependent on loans PhD student has its drawbacks!)

And if this group of men couldn’t be bothered to contact you, maybe the next one will. Take my advice and don’t stop trying. I’ve been single for nearly a decade and have only made one attempt at online dating. And now? I regret the time I wasted not trying.
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:03 am

I can’t even imagine, Cindy! When does the paying gig start? 😉

I see it both ways; when I was single last time I wanted so badly to not be single that I didn’t put enough attention on myself. But now, being single is great (I mean yes, I’d love a good strong man beside me), but it’s allowing me to focus 100% on ME and what I want.. just a different perspective!

Tamara
Twitter: bluetamarai
May 3, 2013 at 5:05 pm

Great post, Jennifer!! I really like the feedback you got from the guys who do Crossfit.

I think there are so many benefits to being single, as well as to being in a relationship. Like any such dichotomy, there are pros and cons to each. I say you’re smart to enjoy what you’ve got going on!! That said, just a bit of a devil’s advocate Q for you: Have you considered emailing those two guys? Maybe they want you to feel comfortable, like the ball is in your court. You never know. Just some food for thought, as it were. 😉

Enjoy your weekend!
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:10 am

I did end up emailing one, Tamara.. and nothing. I just assume it went into his spam box and got deleted 😉

Talking to you when we met and your relationship story made me feel like there is even less rush to do anything right now. I always had the ticking baby clock feeling, but it was coming from other people not necessarily myself. I still don’t even know for sure what I want, but there is no reason to rush into something now; enjoying my time single and know when the time is right, it’ll happen 🙂

Tamara
Twitter: bluetamarai
May 9, 2013 at 10:26 am

Yes, things work out as they are meant to… and in the meantime, we don’t have to know all the answers and exactly what we want. That will make itself clear in time. I’m just so happy that you’re enjoying every minute!! xoxo
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Tasha @ Healthy Diva May 3, 2013 at 5:10 pm

I am married to a non runner and non crossfitter. It does make it hard sometimes because he doesn’t quite understand my obsession with running. He tries to be supportive, but it comes across as negative sometimes. I just wish he would workout to be healthy, but I don’t want to nag him which is probably how I come across. Luckily crossfit doesn’t interfere with him because I go when he is at work. 🙂

Bethany May 3, 2013 at 5:23 pm

I think more women need to be like you. Not necessarily with CrossFit (even though once I am bad ass enough I will be joining a box) but with your way of thinking. Being single has this stigma associated with it, and it’s just not right. I think that if more women (and men) took the time and dedication to be happy with themselves and work on themselves, to be the best they can be, happiness would be found regardless of a significant other.

While I am married, I found out the hard way that putting all your happiness in one other person without being content with yourself is dangerous. Luckily I am coming to grips with that (literally gripping weights) and I’m working through it. But I wish I had worked on myself more first, so that I could not only be a better wife, but be a happier person from the get go.

~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:12 am

Thanks, Bethany 🙂
This whole acceptance with being single is something new for me; I always struggled when I was single; like I didn’t know how to take care of myself on my own. But honestly Crossfit has given me that extra boost of confidence inside and outside the gym to make me realize that the focus needs to be on ME and fighting for what I want and my goals. It’s a beautiful thing.

Alicia
Twitter: acurls
May 3, 2013 at 8:02 pm

Such an interesting topic for discussion!

I think, for sports that do require extreme dedication and consistency, it is very helpful to have someone who either does the sport with you, or has some similar passion of their own. That mutual understanding and interest is key to making relationships work. I know I couldn’t date someone who didn’t have a passion for staying healthy and being healthy, and I couldn’t date someone who didn’t give me the time I need to take care of that element in my life.

And, being single is a wonderful thing. I want to bop girls in the head sometime who complain that they are single or their life isn’t great because they’re single. If you don’t know who you are and aren’t spending time to figure that out, make you happy with you and your life… having a relationship isn’t going to fix anything or make life or your happiness better. That’s not how it works. Relationships are optional, not required! 🙂
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:16 am

It may have taken me 30 years to learn it, but I agree – life can be great being single. You really get to focus on yourself and what you want. Not that being in a relationship is a bad thing at all, but this is definitely a good period of time for me to work on what I want!

Mandy@fatgirlgonehealthy
Twitter: fatgirlhealthy
May 3, 2013 at 8:28 pm

Crossfit or no crossfit, when you find the right person, out will just work. My bf doesn’t crossfit but he supports me. Rock you’re single days, there is nothing wrong with it. I spent years being the only single girl in my circle of friends. Didn’t matter one bit.
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:17 am

I don’t mind being single right now; I wonder sometimes how I would even find time to date or to spend with a guy! That’s why it would be nice if I just end up with someone who does CF that could completely understand my lifestyle 🙂
And great that you have him to support you! Haven’t convinced him yet to join? 😉

RunFastMama
Twitter: runfastmama
May 7, 2013 at 11:48 am

I think most men are intimidated by dedicated women who know what they want and go out and get it. Crossfit, running, etc all takes dedication and it is a total lifestyle.
Hubby does not run, but he fully supports me and never questions my running at all and I think that is crucial. They do not have to do it as well, but total acceptace of your lifestyle is a must 😉
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Matthew May 7, 2013 at 12:18 pm

Just want to chime in again and say that it is really, really not true that men are intimidated or anything by a woman who is fit or dedicated or anything. It’s easy to think that, and we have many examples of weak-willed men being intimidated by strong women. However, I think it is not about “most men” or even some men, but weak-willed men. And really, why would anyone want to be with a weak-willed person? (Hint: You can often tell who is weak-willed by how resistant they are to physical activity)
I’ve been single for nearly a decade, and I wouldn’t for a second think “It’s because most women are intimidated by an independent guy who knows what he wants.” I think it’s because I simply haven’t found the right person, for me.
Every woman is unique and finding the right guy is difficult. If you are doing everything you know to do to be the best possible version of yourself, then there’s not much else to be done, other than continuing to be awesome.

~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:22 am

Your hubby is so supportive of you and your kids to do what you love to do! I mean he’s done races with you, even though he doesn’t run! 🙂

Rebecca May 8, 2013 at 4:54 pm

I do Crossfit and I am totally with you girl. I feel the same way. I don’t know the answer but keep searching you will find him. It would work best for you if you dated a Crossfit muscle man, but that would mean traveling the United States. You could state a dating website strictly for Cross-fitters 🙂 I would definitely join 🙂

~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 9:23 am

I did see somewhere that there is one!! xfit.com maybe? I didn’t look too much into it.. I’ve done the online dating before, but going to be a bit more passive on my search for right now.. few months down the road, who knows? 😉

masters2marathons
Twitter: mast2mar
May 9, 2013 at 1:57 pm

As a fellow single lady, but non crossfitter, I have no advice :/ But I do support your decisions to focus on you, enjoy your time with crossfit and newly found independence! I think that’s all great! Hopefully for both of us, when the right person comes around it won’t matter what type of athletic activities we do that make us happy 🙂
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~jenniferlynn May 9, 2013 at 2:09 pm

You can semi-relate.. if your man didn’t like biking, or swimming, or running, it would be difficult, right?

Side note.. while on the topic.. have you ever considered a triathlon?

masters2marathons
Twitter: mast2mar
May 9, 2013 at 10:29 pm

Yes triathalons would be right up my alley! Just need to magically produce enough money for a street bike, bike shoes, and triathalon suit! Totally on my bucket list for after I graduate and get a job 🙂

And yes, it would be hard to be with someone that I had no athletic overlap with. I’m down to try new things though too! Would love to get back into climbing…
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Shaun Hoobler May 17, 2013 at 10:21 am

Hi ~jenniferlynn – as a new reader to your blog I though I’d just hop on and leave a quick comment here to say I’ve been enjoying it a lot. Cheers! Shaun
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~jenniferlynn May 20, 2013 at 9:18 am

Thanks, Shaun! Glad you stopped by!

Cass May 19, 2013 at 7:33 pm

I think that crossfitters are in a tough position as far as dating. On the one hand I feel as though the gym consists of 80% of a my life, and if he wasn’t there/ involved I’d never see him, we’d have minimum in common, and I’d have to plan time around the gym when I’d rather be working on a new PR. However, if you do date someone from the box and you have a messy break-up the place that was once your second home becomes an uncomfortable environment, especially if you had a lot of mutual friends.

~jenniferlynn May 20, 2013 at 9:20 am

Great point about the messy break-up.. I guess I just assume once I’d date a Crossfitter, we’d get married and live happily ever after.. because really, we have Crossfit. 😉

And I agree.. I’d rather be in the gym working on a PR than trying to impress someone. That’s the beauty of Crossfit; the guys seem to gravitate towards the women that do Crossfit and don’t mind the sweat and everything else that goes along with it!

Mari September 12, 2013 at 11:45 pm

You can’t be serious. Nobody is THAT naive!

Alex @ Alex Tries it Out
Twitter: alex_j_meyer
May 28, 2013 at 12:44 pm

It’s a tricky business – my boyfriend has no interest in running, and obviously, I do!

But it works. He understands me leaving for a 2.5 hour run every week, he drives me to races, and he cheers at the finish line. He listens to me ramble. And complain when I’m sore. So as long as you find someone who’s supportive, I don’t know if it matters if they care about Crossfit :).
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~jenniferlynn May 29, 2013 at 8:12 am

That is great, Alex.. I’ve seen some other runners who do not have supportive men and I cannot even imagine! I’d expect mine to be running next to me, or at least at the finish line!

You guys seems to have so much more in common though.. so it must balance itself out 🙂

Brandon May 30, 2013 at 9:55 pm

I don’t quite understand this post. I mean. I get not having the connection with guys who aren’t in crossfit. That makes perfect sense. What I don’t get is why you are sitting around wishing you had a buff guy by your side. You seem to be an attractive, intelligent woman who is in great shape. How could there not be more men hitting on you at the box than you have opportunity to turn down. Even if the men are there just to work out and not hook up… It is quite easy for a woman to give a guy a look, or to connect on fb and enter into a low key friendship that turns into more. This post while well written and cute, just doesn’t make a lot sense. If you want a man, I can only imagine you could have one if you so chose and if you don’t have one, then its simply because you choose not to.

~jenniferlynn May 31, 2013 at 9:37 am

Thanks for visiting, Brandon!

I wouldn’t say I’m just sitting here wishing and waiting and putting my life on hold for a man.. 🙂 I don’t need to have a man to be happy, but wouldn’t be horrible to have someone to share my passion.

And I’m with you on how could there not be more men flocking to me than I can turn down! 😉 just kidding.. would be nice to have options, but really there aren’t! I’m in no rush 🙂

Lisa May 31, 2013 at 10:36 pm

I can’t believe that I am finally getting around to reading your post! Thanks for taking the time to write it. It’s fantastic! Thankfully, I met the man of my life, before I was introduced to CrossFit. I only say that because we’ve been together for 14 years and I just started CrossFit in February. 🙂 He’s been supportive of my every endeavor since the day we met, so I don’t think it would have been a problem if I had my relationship with CrossFit long before him. I do feel that it’s most important to be able connect with your significant other on many levels, but I don’t feel that you have to be into all of the same things. My husband enjoys running and I hate it. I compete in triathlons and simply run to get to the finish line, but we can talk about our “training” and the many “other” things in our lives. When the time is right, the right man will come into your life no matter what your passions are. Good for you for not just sitting around and waiting for him.

Kenric June 2, 2013 at 5:43 pm

I’ve felt the same way for a long time. I find it hard to keep an interest in women who don’t lift (crossfit or not). I’ve been lifting for a long time, but my then-GF got me to try crossfit and I’m ridiculously hooked. It’s a different atmosphere and it takes a different kind of person who would want to try CF. I am hoping I can find another fit woman or CF woman, as they are hard to come by.

Sara July 3, 2013 at 2:38 pm

Hi! I found your blog after googling “what do guys think about crossfit girls” mostly because I am sort of embarrassed about the way my, uh… upper body now looks (the “girls” are shrinking rapidly and being replaced by pec muscles. Good for CF, yes, but not for my body image…) Anyway, I completely relate to your post! As a newly single lady who has been crossfitting for over a year now (and recently decided to get more serious about it) I feel as if it would be the only thing I’d want to talk about when it comes to dating. Obsessed? Perhaps, but I love it. I really think in order to appreciate my love for CrossFit, I’m going to have to find myself a CF boy. Unfortunately, just about everyone at my box is taken. Bummer!

~jenniferlynn July 3, 2013 at 2:40 pm

Welcome to my blog! My latest blog post is on the same topic.. lol. But more about just embracing being single. Because yeah, I’m kinda married to Crossfit and feel like I can’t cheat on it with a man.. 😉

It’s kinda sad.. I’m loving my new CF body and maybe it is kinda vain but right, not much else to talk about! 🙂 Good luck finding a hottie CF boy! I’d love one myself!

Beki November 20, 2013 at 3:13 pm

I love this post! I have been on a dating website for a month and have emailed a few men, but haven’t gotten a response back! I have started thinking that perhaps I need to find myself a crossfit guy, if I’m really interested in finding anyone at all. Like you, I love not having to check with anyone about when I’m going to get a workout in, or how long I hang around the box for after!

GREAT POST!! 🙂

~jenniferlynn November 20, 2013 at 3:15 pm

Aww thanks Beki!! Happy you found my blog and this post 🙂

It’s a struggle!! I’m on match.com now and have a whole slew of #matchdotcomproblems (if you’re on twitter, check out my hashtag lol). It’s fun, but can be frustrating!

Beki November 20, 2013 at 3:21 pm

haha – I’m glad I found you too! I’m on match.com too. Feels like a waste of $$ so far. I’m going to find your hashtag! 🙂
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karla @ findiny my fit December 23, 2013 at 11:00 am

I agree full-heartedly that guys are intimidated of women who Crossfit UNLESS the man does it as well. Apparently bruises shins/thighs, and beat to hell hands aren’t attractive? I call BS.

I’m newer to Crossfit but am loving what it’s doing for me physically but even moreso-mentally. Also newly single after a 2 year relationship, being able to focus on something 100% is so nice.

Ben January 20, 2014 at 11:40 am

I am newly single after a 4 year relationship with a woman who didn’t do CrossFit. I don’t think that’ll ever happen again. Calluses and muscles are Some of the best parts of a woman. I think I truly learned that when I finally got back into crossfit.
You’re completely right that people who don’t do crossfit don’t get it. I’ve had friends and family try to set me up with women and the first question is “do they crossfit?!” It’s a lifestyle choice that like you’ve said, is one I’m not willing to give up. So all in all find another crossfitter… It’s easier and more fun! 😀

~jenniferlynn January 20, 2014 at 11:43 am

Thanks for the comment, Ben!

It’s really tough! I know some people call crossfit “cult”-like, and in this sense, it almost makes it even more true. You can’t date outside your religion..

I am sure there are plenty of successful couples that only one partner Crossfits, but there seems to be much more compatibility when both people do!

Kathleen January 23, 2014 at 3:52 pm

I’m very happy I came across this blog post. So, I googled (covering my eyes right now) crossfitter dating non-crossfitter and this came up in my search. I have to say as someone who is 31 years old, I agree with 100% of what you wrote. I swear, I fill like I wrote this. I’ve been single since the time I joined CrossFit (almost 4 years). I’ve tried to date plenty, and plenty of interest, but I’m very happy being single and love my CrossFit time, coaching CF Kids classes and time with my pup. Plus, it really is hard to date a non-crossfitter. They just have a hard time understanding why I eat so late, or so much, tons of bacon, torn up hands, excitement about a OHS PR (let alone know what an OHS is), and only meet out for drinks because most food is not paleo-friendly. I’m trying to date someone now who says he will support me, but not one to try it. Yeah, it’s lasted a few weeks and I’m already not working. Hence, why I’m ok with my single life. Thanks! Oh and I may share this as well!

~jenniferlynn January 27, 2014 at 3:23 pm

Thanks so much for checking out the post, Kathleen, and please, share away! 🙂

Oh, don’t be ashamed of what you googled; because I absolutely have thought the same before. They joke Crossfit is a cult, but really, in ways it is. My mother says it’s my religion. You do seek someone who has similar beliefs to you, and I think Crossfit is no exception! I became single a couple weeks after joining Crossfit, so Crossfit became my outlet for everything. Becoming single allowed me to bump up my training to 5x a week and turn the focus to 100% ME. It’s been great, but now at the point where heck, it does get lonely!

I’m currently scoping out the dating sites and may or may not search on the keyword “crossfit” when perusing..

Are you on Twitter (@winetoweights) ? I’d love to connect outside of here and happy to share stories! 🙂

Charlotte July 25, 2014 at 4:25 pm

Aha! I’m sitting on a gold mine here. A dating site for cross fitters.
To be serious, I don’t think it should truly matter if one person is passionate about something, but his/her partner is not. My hubby loves the steel pan and goes to practice practically every night. I am not into the steel pan, but I do appreciate it. I listen to his music, support and encourage him, but I will never be a steel pan girl. (There are many.)
I think what I love is that he has his passions, I have mine. At the end of day, we love each other and can come together and share these passions in a happy balance. If you are refusing to spend quality time with your partner all the time due to cross fit, I think most people would come to be resentful. There has to be a balance.
Anyhoo, best wishes! A gal with muscles shows strong character and dedication. Most men would appreciate that. 🙂

Jenna July 29, 2014 at 2:02 pm

Love this! I’m not a cross-fitter, but I am a heavy weight lifter/avid gym goer/fitness instructor/always active kind of person. It plays a huge part in my life. And being in the dating world isn’t always easy. I find myself talking about lifting all the time. And generally insert the comment, “I apologize if I talk too much about lifting, just let me know if it gets annoying” whenever I would start talking to a guy or go on a date. If I was lucky, I’d find a guy who was into it too. I don’t think it’s wrong at all to want to be with a guy who is into the same stuff as you. I made the joke (although, completely true-not joking), that any guy I’m with better be into working out because that’s the only time he’ll see me. But some couples like to sit at home and watch t.v. together all the time, some couples like to go ride 4 wheelers together, there’s nothing wrong with wanting a guy you can workout with together! A friend asked me if the guy “had to lift” in order for me to date them. Maybe not, but I don’t think I’d really want it any other way. Just my 2 cents… glad to see another single fit lady who “get’s it”.

~jenniferlynn July 29, 2014 at 2:04 pm

This –> “I apologize if I talk too much about lifting, just let me know if it gets annoying”

I have said wayyyy too may times. lol. I like how you put it though, some couples have their hobbies they do; we have ours.

It def makes things easier to have someone on the same page!!

Huh? October 25, 2014 at 9:20 am

I don’t get it, why would a man be intimidated by a woman? Maybe she’s in better shape or stronger than he is but for the most part it just seems strange that you would believe the majority of guys would be turned off by that. Unless he’s a womanizer and he’s worried you could fight back, why the hell would it matter? I’m married but during my dating days, I certainly wouldn’t have been turned off by it – in fact the opposite. More than likely you just weren’t their type or they’re afraid you’re going to try to force them to start doing CrossFit.

Christa @ Living Unbalanced November 3, 2014 at 12:54 pm

Loved this read 🙂 My fiance is a coach, so it’s hard to imagine me not having someone to constantly talk about WODs with. My gym is, kind of strangely, primarily female…like 80% female. We always say it’s because we intimidate the men!
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~jenniferlynn November 3, 2014 at 1:15 pm

Ours is a similar makeup! Mostly women, or their husbands.. haha.

Ironically over the past year, ended up with one of the guys I quoted in this article.. 😉

Matt D. November 3, 2014 at 10:09 pm

“I want someone to cuddle and drink protein shake with”; that’s funny! Anyway, I think it’s better to be with someone who “get it” than somone who don’t and won’t.

Ken @ TripFit.co.uk February 12, 2015 at 7:13 am

I crossfit obsessively whereas my wife prefers distance running and the occasional bootcamp class. so i think whilst its easier and ‘better’ to pair up with a fellow crossfitter; anyone who does sports and appreciated the dedication and passion of it would be more than fine for me.

~jenniferlynn February 12, 2015 at 7:48 am

I can agree with that, especially since distance running has its own quirks, too. Has to make it easier when both embrace the healthy lifestyle.

Christine March 5, 2015 at 11:10 am

Love this read! I started crossFit about 2 years ago! And for one whole year while doing it I was single and I would go in the mornings, afternoons, stay late and work on stuff. Well I started dating someone I met at the place I started out at. Well we both joined two different boxes and I have to say it is NOT any easier dating someone who does Crossfit than someone who does not do Crossfit it is very hard trying to balance our schedules and see each other. He coaches and works out in the mornings when I workout in the evenings. Since he doesn’t have to go to work until 10 and I have to be at work at 8. So it is very difficult trying to see each other and when we do he is ready for bed and tired from being up so early. Or when he wants to do something in the evenings I am all sweaty and want to go home and shower afterwards. So all I have to say about that is keep your head up! Its difficult either way dating a crossfiter or a non crossfiter. 🙂

~jenniferlynn March 5, 2015 at 11:12 am

Haha since i wrote this, I’ve ended up with someone at my own box. We train together but only really see each other on rest days and Saturday nights! Def an interesting dynamic but I still don’t think I’d have it any other way 🙂

anthony navarro November 11, 2016 at 4:58 pm

As a former amateur boxer I can tell you for sure that crossfit girls are VERY popular with combat sport athletes, both in terms of personality and looks. I used to lift a lot of weights but can’t anymore because of injuries and mostly do circuit training, calisthenics and boxing to stay fit these days. I’m wondering if in your experience crossfit girls who are muscular/very devoted to crossfit are attracted to men who are very fit but leaner and less bulky than crossfit guys. I’m 6’2 and fought at 165 pounds, now I am 175. You can see all my muscles clearly but I can’t bench press more than 200 pounds. However I can do 30 pullups or 70 dips and then throw hard punches for an hour straight. For reference take a quick look at boxer Gilberto Ramirez, my physique is just like that. How important are large muscles to crossfit girls? I feel like it’s very important but honestly don’t have any real info to go off of since that’s just my feeling. I would love to hear from any girls who train crossfit whatever their opinion, honestly I think they are the most beautiful women on the planet and I love the dedication and intensity. I would so much rather go out with Lauren Fisher than Kim Kardashian.

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