Sorry I’m not sorry, and you shouldn’t be either

by ~jenniferlynn on April 24, 2014

in inspiration

I once lived in a fantasy world in which what I was doing was the only right way of doing things. My workouts consisted of Crossfit  and my diet was strict paleo. Crossfit + Paleo = Optimal Living, right? For someone who had never had any sort of disordered eating nor body issues, following this type of lifestyle just led me to an unhealthy “healthy” place, becoming judgmental of others and having guilt anytime I strayed away from the strict plan.

Using the wise words of, “Do as I say, not as I did,” I think we need to let go of those guilty thoughts and just start to enjoy things more without the stresses and pressures of the narrow-minded or pietistic around us. Though I have had my own elitist mentality recently and not being able to see shades of gray, it is important to find the appropriate balance that not only works for you and your goals, but also that is sustainable.

From things I have seen recently in social media and things I have experienced myself, we all need to stop being sorry or feeling guilty, and start being comfortable and embracing the decisions that we make. Own your mistakes. Own your insecurities. Own your desires.

sorry not sorry

Don’t apologize for having insecurities about your body, even when you eat right and put in effort at the gym.

Don’t apologize for wanting to look good in a bikini.

Don’t apologize for walking around the house half-naked, often, trying to catch the best angle in the mirror when you flex. Or taking 30 pictures trying to capture said angle.

Don’t apologize for pinching your fat that no one else sees as fat.

Don’t apologize for not having a thigh gap. Or having a thigh gap. Or being genetically blessed.

Don’t apologize for having a strong deadlift but unable to a hollow rock properly. Or string more than ten wall balls.

Don’t apologize for feeling lost in your current programming or training and looking for a change.

Don’t apologize for wanting to do Crossfit. And walk. And run. And powerlift. And Olympic lift. And play hockey or soccer. And do yoga. And bike. And swim. And nap.

Don’t apologize for not being able to swim.

Don’t apologize for working out 5x a week and still looking for the closest parking spot.

Don’t apologize for having a breakdown in the middle of a workout because you put so much pressure on yourself.

Don’t apologize for being 30+ and wanting to wear short shorts outside of the gym. Or mini-dresses. Or leggings. Or yoga pants in public.

Don’t apologize for not having feelings for someone who has feelings for you.

Don’t apologize for being too selfish to give up your time for someone else.

Don’t apologize for attempting to go on a date, but the entire time you are thinking you’d rather be cuddling on the couch with someone else.

Don’t apologize for sleeping in. Or choosing puppy snuggles over anything else.

Don’t apologize for showing up at the office when it may as well have been a vacation day based on the work you did (not) do.

Don’t apologize for not being in love with your job but not having a clue of where else to go.

Don’t apologize for investing your time in a degree or a relationship that had little to no benefit on your future plans.

Don’t apologize for selfies. No, actually, apologize for those.

selfie flexing viewsport

Don’t apologize for eating half a bag of Sour Starbust Jellybeans. Two days in a row. Twice.

Don’t apologize for eating brownies. Or tortilla chips. Or Reese’s eggs. Or turkey patties. Or Crystal Light. Or sucralose. Or a homemade cookie. Or fresh-baked cinnamon raisin toast smothered in butter.

Don’t apologize for making paleo alternatives to Reese’s eggs to impress a boy. Or banana bread. Or muffins. Or brownies. Or chicken thighs.

Don’t apologize for not wanting kids, getting married, or not knowing if you do.

Don’t apologize for hiding all of your friends on Facebook that continuously post about their kids. Or Beachbody. Or Candy Crush.

Don’t apologize for talking about Crossfit. And talking about Crossfit. And talking about Crossfit.

Don’t apologize for awkwardness around an ex.

Don’t apologize for being protective over a guy that you aren’t even dating.

Don’t apologize for secretly disliking a girl solely because she is prettier than you or can lift more than you.

Don’t apologize for setting high standards and feeling no one is, or ever will be, good enough for you.

Don’t apologize for not liking sweet potatoes. Or salmon. Or hazelnut. Or curry. Or pizza.

Don’t apologize for eating carbs in the morning.  Or skipping vegetables at night.

Don’t apologize for leaving a sink full of dishes overnight. Or a hamper full of laundry. Or a half-inch layer of dog hair on the carpet.

Don’t apologize for hitting “Mark All As Read” in your Feedly because you are overwhelmed with content.

Don’t apologize for not wanting to apologize.

Lacey April 24, 2014 at 1:52 pm

Loved this, and thank you!! Some of those I need to hear everyday.

Tamara
Twitter: bluetamarai
April 24, 2014 at 1:54 pm

Nicely said. And oh, how I can relate about those dishes in the sink. We don’t have to talk about how many nights I’ve left a few dirty ones languishing there…
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Jill April 24, 2014 at 2:59 pm

refreshing post!

starburst jelly beans, soo good! i was never a fan of starburst or jelly beans but for some reason the combo is to good to resit.

Lauren April 24, 2014 at 3:02 pm

Love this! So many of these things are true for me. The fat pinching, the blocking Beachbody coaches, carbs in the morning, etc haha People need to stop feeling bad and guilty. I never apologize for eating brownies haha.

Abi@AbsofSteel April 24, 2014 at 3:27 pm

Loves this, it’s all about giving yourself some compassion which I think people way too often fail to do. The one about trying to catch yourself at the right angle in the mirror is hilarious, I swear if I turn a certain way under a certain light I have a 4 pack 😉
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~jenniferlynn April 24, 2014 at 3:28 pm

Right? It’s like suck in, turn this way, angle this way.. 😉

Jacki
Twitter: JackiRHayes
April 24, 2014 at 4:07 pm

All I’ve got is AMEN!

And thank you for the reminder.

Bezzymates April 24, 2014 at 5:03 pm

Really loved reading this. Self acceptance and acceptance of others is so key to live a healthy life. No apologies for just being you.
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Sarah April 24, 2014 at 5:43 pm

LOVE this!!!! I needed to read this today. I have been apologizing to myself alot lately, and mostly for everything you listed above! Yeah, that’s right I’m not apologizing for the dishes I left last night or the fact that I’m genetically skinny, that’s me 😉
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Chris April 24, 2014 at 8:44 pm

I never apologize for my selfies, and I never will.

Sometimes I find myself apologizing for something, just to try and solicit an apology from them.. knowing it is them who should be apologizing in the first place. I’ll stop apologizing for other people.
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Melanie April 25, 2014 at 8:11 am

This made me smile. Great points.

Larissa
Twitter: LarissaDaltonS
April 25, 2014 at 10:39 am

Jenn I LOVE THIS. Just perfect. I’ve been on a “no guilt” kick recently, too. No, I will not feel guilty about skipping that workout or eating that brownie or saying no to cake at a birthday party and getting the side eye or preaching body acceptance to my reflection and readers while still having days where I want to change *everything* about my body.

Maybe its just that I’m too lazy to waste energy on guilt, but seriously, there are much better things I can do with that brain power. 🙂
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~jenniferlynn April 25, 2014 at 10:41 am

Yes, exactly!!

And I think sometimes it’s harder being a blogger or being someone that people look to for advice because people do get so judgey!

Keep being awesome, girl!

Ange @ Cowgirl Runs April 25, 2014 at 11:02 am

I love everything about this post!!
Be awesome. Do you. The end! <3
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~jenniferlynn April 25, 2014 at 11:03 am

Thanks, Ange!! 🙂

Alicen April 25, 2014 at 12:48 pm

Great post! We beat ourselves up so much for not being perfect, not fitting into certain boxes, doing “bad” things and more. It’s refreshing to say to yourself “this is OKAY!” or “I am OKAY!” 🙂

Jenn April 25, 2014 at 1:28 pm

own it jenny!

this was awesome. especially as women, i feel like we’re supposed to be more humble or compassionate or reasonable. just let go, do your thing and make peace with yourself.
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~jenniferlynn April 25, 2014 at 1:37 pm

I think the biggest part is making peace with what you do. Love donuts? Eat the donuts! 😉

getfitchick April 25, 2014 at 4:48 pm

I love this list! Embrace who you are and love life!
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Mary
Twitter: inmyheadspace
April 25, 2014 at 9:31 pm

Love it! Don’t apologize for being you 🙂
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Kelsey @ Ramblings of Change April 26, 2014 at 5:38 pm

This is a freakin’ amazing post!
I think 2014 was my year to really figure out who I am and stick to it. I am done wanting to be “sorry” for who I am, or live up to what others think. If I want to rock the CrossFit culture and talk about it every damn day, I will. And if I want to try strict Paleo for a month, I’ll hold true to myself and just do it. I love me, and if others don’t, then why keep them in my life? No one needs those people who just end up bringing you down. Thanks for this. I needed it. =)
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Kelly April 27, 2014 at 4:41 pm

Loved this!!
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Shelly May 1, 2014 at 11:47 am

Well said, Jennifer! Too often, we judge ourselves again unrealistic standards.

We should all embrace our inner quirkiness a little more and never apologize for what makes us unique. Different is good.
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~jenniferlynn May 1, 2014 at 11:47 am

Thanks for reading!!

Becca May 22, 2014 at 9:32 am

I love this! And sorry, I’m not sorry about that 🙂

~jenniferlynn May 22, 2014 at 9:33 am

Hehe, thanks for reading, Becca!! 🙂

Nicole
Twitter: mast2mar
May 28, 2014 at 11:45 pm

Inspirational post! And I love those striped leggings! I would not be sorry to wear them in public cuz they are so fun!!! Your post is very true though, people can be judgemental on just about everything. People think its weird that I now wake up at 4:45am to go to the gym to train for races (and a tri series!) and that I go to bed by 8-9pm. But OH WELL! Keep not being sorry my dear, you are a great role model for crossfitters and noncrossfitters alike!
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lynne January 28, 2015 at 7:25 pm

I guess this is a great reminder for all of us to stop being guilty and just do the things we love to do. Thanks for sharing.
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~jenniferlynn January 28, 2015 at 7:28 pm

Thank you for reading!! Absolutely true!

Sherill February 17, 2015 at 12:00 am

Loved the post! I am guilty of quite a few of these things and yes felt bad about it but hey, we are only human! I’m not sorry! Thanks for sharing.

~jenniferlynn February 17, 2015 at 12:01 am

Thanks for reading! Always a good reminder. How did your stumble upon this post?

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